Recently i have been really stressed out, and a craving for a new change or a new look for me. Life has been so hectic, and i always say i will try harder or try to be successful, but i end up being so lazy to even do anything. So i will spilt these stressful things into parts/paragraphs. Just to separate each thing from one another. colors my vary
..:: School ::..
Oh school, the joy of it -0-
I'm into my second semester of secondary school. For my subjects I have in first period Math with this psycho teacher. One time I skipped class, cause well I didn't want to go to her class obviously. The next day when I go into class, she comes straight up to me and asks me where I was the previous day. I kinda lied (which is totally bad don't do it =//) and instead of taking it outside and talking to me, like mature people in high school. She just raises her voice at me in front of the whole class. Seriously, what is that?! She also teaches math horribly. And having a bad teacher or a good teacher effects on how you do in that certain class, well at least for me. Right now i have probably at 54% in that class or just a tad bit higher in that. I have to admit, it is also on how much I put effort into that class, and at the moment, i'm not putting that much effort. Second period i have dance. Now dance, I just absolutely am in love with. It gives me the work out i want without sweating or getting gross after that class, but still keeps me thin. I enjoy the class so much, but I wish it was at the end of the day. I would love to end my day at school with a little bit of dance. But I thats okay =D. Third period (after my lunch break) i have foods. Food -0- what can I say. You cook probably only 2 days a week then the rest is worksheets. I basically fail that class, cause I don't do the work sheets. -0- But I really should. Fourth period, I have science. OMG science... at first I loved science. Everyday after school I would come home, go on my computer, and start typing out the notes from science from that day. But now ever since I missed a day of school, and missed a HUGE test (our second test with this teacher) that was out of 75. I had no idea there was gonna be a test, well... I did but I just forgot the date =0 oops... lol
The teacher yelled at me because I was talking to my friend beside me that had just got back her test. So therefore it looked like I was trying to get the answers for the test, well basically cheating. But I wasn't. Anyways, the teacher said to me "oh your just gonna sit there? knowing there was a test, and not be a mature person, and ask to take the test. Instead you sit there looking at such and such's test? Thats just ignorant of you. I should not let you take the test, and just give you a 0. How does that sound?" UGH I was so frustrated. From that day, it made me hate that teacher, and that teacher also hates me. I try to avoid the two teachers that hate me =/ ugh TT.TT life at school. Oh then there is just one more thing to fit here in the topic of school. The people there. Just straight up. There all two faced. And I can least admit that I do act two faced. And I feel kinda bad for it. But you know what, I just do it, because there are people that talk to me, and I will have no idea what they are talking about, so i just say " uh huh, yea totally agree =)" just so they will leave me alone, but they always end up coming back =// I feel bad. I feel I need to stop doing that =(. Influenced by people around me, so I ended up like that =/
..:: Friends ::..
Some of my friends, just flat out effing suck ass. So recently, and by recently I mean 2 days ago, on friday. I'll tell you the story. The last sunday before spring break ended for me, my friend (leaving name anonymous) is having problems with her boyfriend. She told me her boyfriend had said to her that they need time about to think about what been going on between them two. After she quickly messaged me afterwards and told me, and asked me to hang a sleepover with her, to get a makeover, and to just talk about whats been going on in our lives. She asks to do it on friday, right after school. I agree to it. All week we plan this. She is saying oh yea totally psyched for friday =) haha~ Friday comes, and we go to shopper drug mart to buy hair dye. We get there, and she forgets her wallet. I have to pay for her. Yea at first I didn't mind, I could spare her. That total comes to around 40$, she owes me 25$. Then we get to my house getting ready and stuff. Then she asks me if she can have my hair extensions. I had first said no, and she wouldn't stop bothering me about having them. So in the end, I said fine just have them. Thats like 250$ down the drain, now I have no hair extensions, so I will have to buy some new ones. anyways, she tells me, oh we can't sleepover tonight. I was kinda pissed off, cause she was starting to get on my nerves. She is the one that asked me for sleepover, and she cancels? Thats just, UGH! idk how to describe, but I mean, why ask me, if you know we aren't going to sleepover, and not tell me the reason why. Anyways, I say oh okay:( thats fine. She says to me, oh I PROMISE tomorrow we will. Tomorrow comes, I text her in the morning to make sure we are still on for tonight. I don't get a text back till about 7:45 pm, and she tells me. Oh i have tutor right now. I asked her right after when you done? * no texts back* Hour passes by, "Oh okay i'm done tutor now, how about we do sleepover next week". I say " why not today?" No text back for another hour and a half " i didn't know my parents would be home". I say " so? we can't still have fun?" no text back. I keep my dad waiting up just to see if he can drive me cause obvs i can't drive there myself in pitch dark, so i ended up talking off all my makeup, and eating away my feelings with ice-cream. TT.TT friends suck she totally blew me off. UGH she wont pay me back either :( . But thats just a recent event TT.TT there was a lot more before with other friends. moving on...
..:: Money Issues ::..
I get money from my parents. Yea, yea I know, people are thinking * what a spoiled girl* -0- but you know what, I actually want to work, to earn more money. But heres the thing. My mom and dad don't want me to work during school. Now your thinking *why not work in summer* well there is a reason. I have a special someone visiting me, and they don't know the place I love very well... So I have to stay with them, so they wont get lost. And also, I am only able to see this person, hardly ever... maybe once a year. Anyways, I am always trying to find a job, but I can't really apply for anything, because of my age, but once I turn a good age, where they hire teenagers at my age. Also, I lend, or pitch in the most money to my friends. And a lot of them owe me money, but I just let it go because I don't want to stress over trying to get back the money. But now I am trying to get out of that.
..:: Family ::..
Last but not least the family. I feel I don't communicate with my family very much. I mostly tell my dad about drinking or something like that cause he understands it more than from my mom. And I tell my mom about grades and boys, and just other things, because she understands it more than my dad, and its kinda awkward to talk about that stuff with my dad. I never keep anything really from my parents. I'm an open book to them. I know this is kinda mean, but one of my friends asked me " if your parents got divorced, who would you want to live with more?". I chose my mom. I feel more open to my mom, and less embarrassed to be around her, or be with her in public.
Okey This is a really really long blog post. I promise I wont have anymore long ones like this for awhile, lol partly because people wont want to read a post thing long, but also, it takes soo long to do it, and I am too lazy =PP
Smile, your all beautiful
Vicky❤
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